Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Much Royalty

I'm feeling tired tonight and Tufa Girl has done most of my work for me which I really appreciate.

St Francis had a tendency to roam, so for his own protection the lions tied him to the rail

Pssh, try not to pay attention to the freaky guy. I hear he is on the Dew.
 Hey you guys, is Francis teetered really good, you know what happened last time

Score (everything pretty much supplied by Tufa Girl, my comments are in red)

Left side:

2 oriental lions (lion dogs?) guarding the porch from evil: 2 points
St. Francis sheltering the dove (and chained to the porch): 0 points
African lion: 1 point

Right side:

African lion guarding ornate column (something seems to be missing!)(yeah where is the required glazing globe?): 2 points
Lowly deer in the protection of the porch shadow: 1 point
Pink flamingo running for cover ('cause he doesn't want to be hog-tied): 1 point
Lion dog face (that Lion is on the Mountain Dew, I have a friend who gets like that): 1 point


Side yard with lion: 1 point
Cute yard light (street lamp): 0 points
White swan with lovely lashes (mascara): 1 points

Subtotal: 10 points

Creativity Bonus

For the lion collection, both African and Oriental but mostly for the Lion who had electroshock therapy: 2 points

Total: 12 points

Tufa even found a closing although I am a little sad with the lack or lions and I am somewhat confused by the dog...oh never mind...

Monday, August 30, 2010

Gardening Is A Talent Requiring Super Human Skills

Whenever a submission to entered into play in The Yard Art Game, I reply  with the understanding  that yard has been received and placed in the holding queue for future scoring (well I reply in some fashion and the reporter eventually figures out the process). If you do not receive a comment from me, please resubmit or send me a nasty note for ignoring your hard earned reporting.

Diane comments and submits: love the welcome rock.
Lifeshighway comments and acknowledges effort: They have the same gardening skills as I do!
Diane having the last word and pretty much writing my entry for me: HAaaaa the rock should say 'welcome to my pathetic garden of 3 sh*tty tomatoes'

I have nothing funnier to say. Damn you clever field reporters!

  • Squirrel with cherished nut: 1 point
  • 2 cherubs with tiny birdbath (maybe for dragonflies): 1 point
  • Frog with umbrella (which seems pointless given the condition of the crops): 1 point
  • Teeny turtle: 1 point
  • Violin playing frog: (drowning out the tomato screams): 1 point
  • Welcome rock (hmph, I still have nothing better to say): 1 point
  • 3 tomatoes plants not in the best of health: 0 points

Subtotal: 6 points

Creativity Bonus

For the fiddle playing frog and for the awesome gardening skills: 2 points

Total: 8 points

a much better gardener with a good 5 year plan:

Sunday, August 29, 2010

Running the fenceline

Although you may think I am a hip urbanite with rarefied tastes, mannerisms and deportment, in actuality I grew up in the country. I know this shocks you... take a moment to recover from this earth shattering discovery of my true nature.

Country people have a deep love of lawn ornamentation. They take to yard art seriously and share their treasures with unabashed pride.

eventer79 comments and submits:

"This collector not only had her own homemade donkey kitsch, but had lined her entire property front fence with decoration as well.  Said fence was probably 50 meters long, I wish I could have fit it in one pic for scale! "

You can just tell a happy friendly person lives here...

Hey y'all

Score (list provided by eventer79, my comments are in red)
  • Wire peacock: 1 point
  • red dangly spinner: 1 point
  • 2 cherubs: 2 points
  • frog: 1 point
  • birdbath: 1 point
  • horsehead on back fence (I prefer horses with their bodies attached, as a general rule): 1 point
  • froggy thingy: 1 point
  • blue flag: 0 points
  • little girl: 1 point
  • giant mouse (I thought it was a mole, or a groundhog?): 1 point
  • enormous flower on a stick: (happy people, have happy wire flowers): 1 point
  • 2 suns on a stick: 2 points
  • teeny flower basket: 1 point
  • snail on a stick (happy people who like things impaled on sticks) 1 point
  • decorative pokey things (fake cattails in miniature?) (impaling and poking) 1 point
  • little squirrel: 1 point
  • star on a stick (they love to cram things on sticks here) (exactly what I said!): 1 point
  • 3 wire heron: 3 points
  • mini cart holding flowers in background: 1 point
  • another frog: 1 point
  • girl with book: 1 point
  • 3 deer: 3 points
  • 2 cherubs in background: 1 point
  • homemade wooden donkey and cart. with folding chair for observers. donkey is forever weary and sad because (home-made but falls within the kitsch ruling) 3 points
  • deformed wooden fish thing is always chasing him (it seems to have 5 eyes): 1 point
  • wind sock: 1 point
  • wooden flag: 1 point
  • egret statue: 1 point
  • waving frog (I like him) 1 point
  • pile o turtles: 1 point
  • pelican on a stump: 1 points
  • silver orbs (on a stick): 1 point
  • cross w/ angel: 0 points
  • more silver orbs: 1 points
  • mini canada goose flapping his wings at a fallen comrade: 2 points
  • two fallen statues: ( I am thinking they are dutch people but not enough info to make a calling): 2 points
  • dove on a stick: 1 point
  • boy with hat: 1 point
  • two canada geese: 1 point
  • teeny kid statue: 1 point
  • teeny turtle statue: 1 point
  • rainbow flower on a stick: 1 point
  • two kids hiding behind fence: 1 points
  • wire orb holder (good play, but looks religious calling the anti-lighting rule): 0 points
  • another flag: 0 points
  • squirrel: 1 point
  • wire flamingo. on a stick. of course. (of course) 1 point
Subtotal: 47 points

Creativity Bonus

While the fence presentation is very entertaining, and I enjoyed the display along the road, the collection lacked a dramatic flare. A good mega-yard because of the line up but not a great one: 2 points

Total: 49 points

3 yummy taste treats all in one package on a stick! Let the city people beat that!

    Saturday, August 28, 2010

    Poseidon's Cast-Offs

    I love mythology. When I was a child I could not get enough of ancient myths and legends. I read every book in the library on the tales of the Greek and Roman gods. From there I moved onto Gaelic and Norse deities. Which all being said is more cool than the nerdy little secret I currently have of reading fantasy novels (although I vehemently claim it is science fiction because science fiction is  less pathetic).

    Field Reporter Luna Kris has a new blog Mythological Beasties and Co where she gives an excellent explanation on the Hippocamp: part horse/ part fish and an important element in Poseidon's sea creed.

    Of course, being immortal has its downsides. After  a cataclysmic crash, this team was retired.

    "I told YOU to turn left at the coral reef...but would you listen to me... NO"

    Guess which one is the mare

    Friday, August 27, 2010

    The Frog King

    The King of the Frogs cannot be glorified by just any throne.

    Much to Consuelo's shame. She also wishes the Mr. Hands would keep his slimy paws to himself.
    "One day, The Frog and The Hands, they will die"

    On the other hand, the Frog Queen is very displeased
    where the court jester, Water Melon Boy, is quite happy with the new arrangement at court.

    Thursday, August 26, 2010

    The Waif

    There are many websites and etsy stores dedicated to dressing geese, outfitting geese  and seasonally decorating geese. You would think that if you were own one of these fastionista fowls that you would not let their poor little outfit literally rot off their bodies like a sad neglected orphan bird.

    Kristi submits:

    Apparently a lot of time was devoted on the welcome sign
    so poor forgotten Maxine's dress has turned to rags and her little hat is no longer jauntily cocked on her head.  I feel Maxine's shame.

    Score (List provided by Kristi, my comments are in red)

    • 7 wind chimes: 7 points
    • 1 whirligig thingie: 1 point
    • Welcome fence...lovingly painted (poor poor Maxine, no longer the favored item): 1 point
    • Decorative birdhouse on a stick: 1 point (bird don't reside in houses on sticks)
    • Leaning unused birdbath...From Pisa ?: 1 point
    • Flower thingie on a stick: 1 point
    • Christmas lights on pole (hmmm, I'm calling festive): 0 points
    • 2 forlorn swaybacked benches. (functional but forlorn): 0 points
    • Poor yard goose ...ravaged by time and weather. She is shockingly half nekkid. (poor thing): 2 points
    • Daddy / Mommy/ and baby texas stars (these stars do get around) 3 points
    • And the lovely rusty livestock waterer planter (wow, that is one big flower pot): 0 points
    • Flag leftover from the 4th of July (Ok, I'll give you that one) 1 point + 2 points holiday bonus
    Subtotal:  20 points

    Creativity Bonus

    Where the welcome/address sign is very very fancy, I have to give credit for proud Maxine who stands  daily waiting for her wardrobe to change: 2 points

    Total: 22 points

    poor Maxine always a bridesmaid but never a bride

    Wednesday, August 25, 2010

    Santa's Work Shop

    Marguerite comments and submits

    "We just got back from a trip to Nova Scotia and I couldn't wait to send these. It's a bit of an oxymoron I think. I mean, the Christmas ornaments are just screaming 'hey, we're friendly interesting people, come on in' but the signs say Keep Out!"

    That's one interpretation: I think Santa et al. are mixing a profitable brew during the off season
    Floating Santa head says "no, no to visitors"
    Sidekick brown Santa says "and we have the elf eatin' dogs to back us up"
    Dogs seems to guard the entire complex, apparently reindeer are not very protective
    Another Santa minion protecting the flank with the aid of the pack of invisible dogs
    Also watch out for the attack cow

    Score (list provided by Marguerite, my comments are in red)
    • 2 Santa Claus pictures on white shed: 2 points + 18 points (holiday bonus, hoo-ah!)
    • trellis with plastic flowers on side of house: (an unfortunate trend in plastic flower displays) 1 point
    • Christmas lights on brown shed: 1 point + 9 points (holiday bonus)
    • dragonfly on brown shed: 1 point
    • broken santa picture on brown shed: 1 point + 9 points (holiday bonus)
    • fox peeking out of tree stump with Beware of Dog sign: 1 point
    • Christmas lights on both floors of house plus the porch: (tsk) 1 point + 9 points
    • What appears to be two cows lounging in the yard: backup sentries 2 points
    • Broken bird bath in front yard: 2 points
    • 2 plastic swans with plastic flowers: 2 points
    • 3 flower wreaths: 0 points (I'm not crazy about them but I usually only score belated holiday wreaths)
    • 4 sets of wind chimes: 4 points
    • squirrel on porch railing: 1 point
    • Some unidentifiable whatnot next to house number (yeah not sure) 1 point
    • 3 plastic planters full of plastic flowers (plastic, in summer with stuff blooming I would say they were lazy but heck Christmas is still up so whats the point): 0 points
    Subtotal: 65 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For Santa's little meth lab: 3 points

    Total: 68 points

    Excellent holiday bonus find, Al salutes you:

    Tuesday, August 24, 2010

    The Valance

    According to Miriam Webster

    valance: a short drapery or wood or metal frame used as a decorative heading to conceal the top of curtains and fixtures.

    The so-called experts of Miriam Webster did not think to include bottles! Humph some experts....

    Tufa Girl submits an homage to a man's love of the brew
    exciting, fresh (well it would be if the bottle are rinsed), unique and utterly astoundingly awful

    No points because it is functioning adequately as a...a...decorative heading, yeah that's it.

    Of course I am assuming it's a guy....

    Monday, August 23, 2010

    Texas Pride

    Craig of Ellis Hollow spotted this little piece of Texas hospitality on the Fail Blog:

    "How'd you score this one"

    First I would like to point out that I will take submissions from other sources if you spot something interesting and I think the Blog writer/owner would not want the points for themselves. Seeing how the Fail Blog is part of the I Can Has Cheezeburger Network, I do not believe they are dying to play The Yard Art Game (shocking, I know!). Also you could recruit, beg, conjole and plead another blogger to let you use their pictures for scoring and I would of link them. Again given that the blogger does not want to play the game themselves. I cannot imagine such a person but they seem to exist by the millions billions.

    The art is shameful on two levels making me believe the yard artist is a Texan transplant, a wannabe, a pretender Texan native. I hate a fake Texan.

    Level 1: (the obvious one)  you'll - enough said
    Level 2: (the subtle one) the star is covered! Come on, if we have learned anything playing this game via the blog universe is that Texans cannot get enough of showing off their star. It is like getting a boob job. Once a woman gets one, everyone has to see 'em. She won't keep those puppies indoors.


    - Sign of stupidity: 1 point

    Subtotal: 1 point

    Creativity Bonus

    For a State shaped decoration all brightly painted sporting a somewhat confusing welcome: 2 points

    Total: 3 points

    Proud of being a Texan:

    Sunday, August 22, 2010

    The Bowling Ball Yard

    The Higher Power spent the weekend here at Life's Highway. Besides doing obligatory family stuff, the required horse riding and  desired friend visiting, we spent time discussing some of the trickier entries that have been submitted to the The Yard Art Game. The following is the trickiest received in quite a while. This will sting a little but the yard is fun.

    Cindy of Cindy's Clipboard does a whole lot of traveling. At least it seems that way to me. She is always off on some road trip or other, therefore she is a perfect field reporter.  Cindy comments and submits

    "I'm so excited! The Husband and I found some awesome Oklahoma yard art this weekend. I would like to submit it for points in your game."

    Bowling Ball Yard Art - Nowata, OK - Pop over and enjoy!

    First, I love this collection. It is a labor of love and over the top insanity.

    But here is the bad news:

    As much as I want to see this bowling ball extravaganza, The Higher Power and I cannot help but call this a roadside attraction. Now here me out: I realize this is a private home. But this collection was created for the sole purpose of getting people come out, walk about the property and enjoy the constructed edifices.

    I am calling in the Art Rule. Also you can find The Bowling Ball at Roadside America

    As much as The Bowling Ball Yard is a thing of wonder and beauty I cannot in good faith score it. Sorry, Cindy.

    I await comments from the gallery. Please go over and visit Cindy and leave a commiserating comment.

    another good use for bowling balls: zombie control

    Saturday, August 21, 2010

    The Good Boy - Kind Of

    The Higher Power and I discussed this yard at length today. I'll let you read the comments.

    CTWD comments and submits:

    "Dad was out wandering around in trailer land when he came across these guys guarding the bridge over the moat in front of 'the house (single wide) of prayer. I was not with him to provide proper supervision or reporting expertise. He does get credit for trying."

    So what we have here is yard art decorating the front of a trailer church. No angels, no saints, no crosses. It IS a church but it IS a single wide... and these are not religious symbols  that I know of...OK...I'm scoring it. If you do not see or hear from me in the next few days I have suffer a death or stroke from lightning bolt.

    • Buster Brown his Sunday Go To Meetin' knickers creeping slowly away from church: 1 point
    • 4 dogs and Tige keeping boy from escaping and getting his snazzy shirt dirty: 4 points
    • Drawbridge across the moat: 0 points
    • Stripe-y mailbox (mailboxes aren't scored but noteworthy): 0 points
    Subtotal: 5 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For the doggie display and the naughty boy who does not get to wear big boy pants: 2 points

    Total: 7 points

    Obviously every good boy needs a beating once a week

    The Higher Power is disappointed by the lack of photo proof of single wide house of prayer.

    Thursday, August 19, 2010

    The Pole Sitter

    Pole sitting requires balance, dedication and endurance. As a hobby it makes absolutely no sense to me but Henry is determined to break the pole sitting record and become famous for his great skill.

    Tufa Girl submits:
    "I will sit here rain, heat or flood with Jesus covering my back"
    Jesus may cover his back but he does not provide adequate cover from birds

    • Henry on a stick: 1 point
    • Jesus on the address sign: 0 points
    • Swan: 1 point
    • Bird on a wire: 1 point
    • Turtle in a fancy basket: 1 point
    Subtotal: 4 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For a large pole sitting boy in the front yard and his vibrant spooky blue eyes: 2 points

    Total: 6 points

    Pole Sitter

    Makes you wonder about how Henry is doing... Also try to avoid looking too closely.

    Wednesday, August 18, 2010

    The Uneasy Partnership - Gnome and Gargoyles

    In architecture a gargoyle is a carved stone grotesque with a spout designed to convey water from a roof and away from the side of a building. A grotesque figure is a sculpture that does not work as a waterspout and serves only an ornamental or artistic function. These are also usually called gargoyles in layman's terminology,although the field of architecture usually preserves the distinction between gargoyles (functional waterspouts) and non-waterspout grotesques. - Wikepedia

    Well excuse me Mr. Wikipedia expert. Seems like someone has a stick up their butt.

    Diane comments and submits:

    "gargoyles, tree bottles and gnomes oh my!"

    The cruel boredom of gargoyles at low altitudes

    Garden gnomes perfectly relaxed withing their mushroom kingdom
    Lions don't care for the company of gnomes and/or grotesqueness
    yeah, those make sense

    • 3 "gargoyles: 3 points
    • 4 large mushrooms: 4 points
    • 3 gnomes taunting their ground bound companions: 12 points
    • 2 disapproving lions: 2 points
    • Flower on wall: 1 point
    • Triangle bell: 1 point
    • Lion handling loop: 1 point
    • Gargoyle on a slightly higher elevation: 1 point
    • Tiny gargoyle grouping: 1 point
    • Rock head (do NOT like, creeps me out): 1 point
    • 2 bottles hanging from  a tree branch (? pretty lazy bottle tree): 2 points
    • Another grotesque statue (sigh) on the ground: 1 point
    • 3 random mini-flags: 3 points
    • Lady bug: 1 point
    • Castle: 1 point
    • Signs from 2 different security companies and a guard gnomes (paranoia anyone?): 4 points
    Subtotal: 39 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For my annoyance at being lectured on Wikipedia by an expert who know absolutely nothing about yard art and the uneasy truce between gnomes and gargoyles: 3 points

    Total: 42 points

    I assume these technically fall within Mr Wikipedia OCD's definition of a gargoyle

    Tuesday, August 17, 2010

    Purple House Metamorphosis and the Brain Who Rules It

    Winnie found her very own Purple House. Every town should have a purple house. Heck, every field reporter should get out there and find a purple house.

    Yes I was literally in the yard for the last two shots on the sidewalk with the camera resting on the top of the stroller. (the Diane maneuver)

    We call this house "the house of perpetual construction" as they have been in continual remodel since I moved to this town six years ago. They have finally finished painting, it used to be yellow.

    But be careful:
    You may have found the evil life form responsible for the horror that hatches from a large clay ball.

    Score (list provided by Winnie, my comments are in red)
    • 2 birdhouse on fence post: could be functional 0 points
    • red white and blue star hanging: 1 point
    • green topped birdhouse from tree: 0 points
    • St. somebody (hey I'm not Catholic) behind the gate (ah ha ha, um...shame) 0 points
    • spiral staircase pot holder (fancy-smancy) 0 points
    • 2 patriotic buntings: 2 points + 2 holiday bonus
    • wrought iron curlicue wheel thing: 1 point
    • the bicycle with real live plants growing in the basket (obviously not functioning): 1 point
    • Large Terra Cotta ball (shudder) 1 point
    • hill billy ball on spike: 1 point (there are no points for evil but there should be)
    • 3 more buntings 3 points + 3 points holiday bonus
    • birdbath: 1 point
    • sea horse birdbath (lovely kitsch) 3 points
    • no art to report - just wanted a good shot of the wicker furniture on roof between the house and garage (where else would you keep extra furniture?)
    • previously unseen ball: 1 point
    • concrete item by step: 1 point
    • wind chimes: 1 point
    • 2 fake ivy topiarys on porch (I don't count these but I like to not plastic plants) 0 points
    • clear hillbilly ball: 1 point
    • blue butterfly: 1 point
    • dragonfly: 1 point
    • wishing well: 1 point
    Subtotal: 20 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For a fairly nice collection of gazing globes, and for the knowledge that people actually purchase large clay balls and for finding the brain mastermind who uses mind control to get you to buy one: 3 points.

    Total: 23 points

    Another Brain mastermind:

    Monday, August 16, 2010

    What Would I Do With A Flock of Flying Monkeys

    Laura of Fetch My Flying Monkeys is my absolute favorite blogger of all time. Yes, it's true, I love her. You don't have to understand her, most people do not understand a genius. I open her blog and have no idea if today I will be in the mad house or on a hyper thrilling roller coaster. It's white knuckled fun for sure. Unfortunately,a price must be paid and I feel compelled to be somewhat witty in my responses. After the excitement of her entry and my weak burst of creative repartee, I have to go take a nap.

    Anyway, Laura has been in the market for an appropriate piece of yard art... I think I found it on Ted's Big Ride.

    "It's always a matter of priorities!
    The house may not be finished, but the yard art is coming along quite nicely, thank you!"

    A yard artist has got to do what a yard artist has to do. You can get siding up any ol' time.

    Sunday, August 15, 2010

    The World's Happiest Salesman

    Andrew J Pettigrew was a happy man. Not only had he unloaded the colossal flamingos on the Jones' household

    but they were so thrilled, he also got a foot massage thrown in for his effort.
    "I chose the Dijon sauce, it tickled"

    Thanks frogmuseum2!

    Saturday, August 14, 2010

    I'm Sorry But Art Is Not A Yard Sale

    It is  not likely possible that some very fine artists stumble across this blog. Artists who have a vision, who have something to say and share with the world. Unique individuals who make an impact both culturally and socially to the human condition.

    And then there is this:

    photo by jeffs4653 spotted by Tufa Girl

    It is a like a macrame Highlight search an find game:

    The wicked witch of the east
    E. Johnson tracker in the near future specializing in locating love dolls
    Nefertiti as portrayed by Elizabeth Taylor
    Statue of Liberty with a touch of color
    Julie Cristie as Lara in Dr Zhivago
    Jason with a tongue disorder
    A gameboy - old school
    The guy in Blue Lagoon who you never remember his name
    Various cast members and rejects for Saw I - VII
    A living plant

    Tufa Girl: "I found the Cherry 2000 grave yard!"

    Your turn.

    Friday, August 13, 2010

    Chickens and Cinder Blocks

    Cinder Blocks are the South's non-sticky solution to anything that needs fixing, propped up, mounted or tied down. I can honestly say I have never purchased a cinder block in my entire life. But I know if I reach for one at any given time, be it at my house, my Mom's house, my barn or the side of the road a cinder block will be close at hand. I believe they grow out of the southern soil like mushrooms after a rain. Think of them as the Lego's of the South.
    eventer79 comments and submits:

    "They really really really like birds"

    But mostly chickens...
    OK and ducks....
    Highly disgruntled and not at all courting pair of frogs
    OK, swans too but that's it
    Wait, do you see anything odd about those dutch people?
    ignoring their behavior
    cherubs who are obviously cherished in a regal position, ignoring the pelican

    Score (list provided by eventer79, my comments are in red)

    • Fountain lady statue with falling off dress (wanton hussy): 1 point
    • Mama brown duck with three baby ducks (two brown and one green -- the mailman's duckling?): 4 points
    • Broken fallen over lantern thingy (semi and theoretically functional): 0 points
    • Black hen with three chicks (again, one mismatched one. methinks the mailman gets around) (carrier pigeon perhaps) 4 points
    • Black and white polka dotted hen with three chicks. One is sleeping in the grass: 4 points
    • Frog (should shut his mouth): 1 point
    • Spitting frog fountain (not much better) 1 point
    • Two pink flamingos hiding in background (should I call these kitsch, I have been considering) 2 points
    • Kitschy frogs with broken umbrella (it's in the grass behind the bush): 3 points
    • 3 Empty swan planter (one had its beak snapped off. Must have been too noisy) (nothing planted, they are decor): 3 points
    • Terra cotta goose planter (Are you my mommy?): 1 point
    • Giant frog lurking in birdbath: 2 points
    • blue kissing dutchies with bad aim: tanned perhaps 3 points
    • cow in a cinder black (hey, I have a friend who used to do this to her pygmy goats. what an animal abuser) (I never!... whistling and walking away): 1 point
    • two country girl silhouettes: 2 points
    • hen (can't have enough chickens): 1 points
    • black rooster who has commandeered two chicks: 3 points
    • two black hens with five chicks (chickens breed like rabbits): 7 points
    • black squirrel: 1 point
    • bell wind chimes: 1 point
    • four intact mushrooms: 4 points (I am refraining)
    • two broken mushrooms: 2 points
    • two plywood polar bears humping PVC poles ( I am so glad that I did not say this): 2 points
    • seriously ruffly dress girl: 1 point
    • smug persian cat (is there any other kind?) (nope) 1 point
    • pumpkin (uhhh, Halloween was 10 months ago!) (I am OUTRAGED!) 9 points holiday bonus + 1 (geez people, a pumpkin)
    • pelican in a birdbath propped on a 55 gallon barrel: 1 point + 2 point broken birdbath in use
    • two cherubs on a cinder block (they must have tried to wander too) (they can drag it but it is hard to actually run, not that I know anything about that kind of thing): 1 point
    Subtotal:  67 points

    Creativity Bonus

    For the creative use of cinder blocks in a yard art setting and for frustrated polar bears: 3 points

    Total: 70 points

    Tying a concrete block to another concrete block creates a warp in the space time continuum, only one could survive in the vortex. Obviously the dork block had to go.

    Wednesday, August 11, 2010

    Where an important new methodology is revealed

    Tufa Girl shares a brilliant and earth shattering field reporter method to escape capture. Let's all huddle around her and learn:

    "Yard art stalking technique #44. - Look for yard art across the street from house for rent or sale.  You can hover, have a camera in hand and can easily say you were taking pictures of the yard art (er, neighbors) to remind you of the neighborhood."

    Mrs. Jones was always confused about the concept of a screen

    Score (list provided by Tufa Girl, my comments are in red)
    • 2 birdbaths – one for tall birds – one for short birds: seems fair 2 points
    • Angel with flower wand on black hanger (if an angel has a wand, she's a fairy): 1 point
    • Cute birdhouse: functional 0 points
    • Huge flat ladybug in small tree: 1 point
    • Stained glass window on hummingbird hanger: (um, I am liking the windows): 0 points
    • Lone Star flag on hanger: (Mrs. Jones likes a hanger): 1 point
    • Bathing Bunny with carrot and bath: 1 point
    • Angel (?) statue: (fairy) 1 point
    • 2 pink flamingos shoved in the crepe myrtle: (flamingo shame) 2 points
    • Red white and blue boot (wonder if it has a star?): (I wonder if it has a hat) 1 point
    • 4 huge dragon flies on a trellis(?): 4 points
    • 8 clear and green insulators (a yard art first?!?) (I used to see these quite a bit years ago): 8 points
    • 2 shiny balls on tall stakes: 2 points
    • Square lampshade in middle of flower bed (what the…) (Mrs. Jones is also somewhat confused about electricity): 1 point
    • Welcome banner with birdhouses: 1 point
    • Some other decorative gray hanger to the right: 1 point
    • Handle to nowhere ( left of square lampshade): (I think it may be a wagon): 1 point
    • Lovely heart shaped trellises holding hanging plants: functional and pretty 0 points
    • 4 green iron stars (boy it was hot today, these stars came in handy) (hee) 4 points
    • 2 stained glass windows hanging: (still liking them): 0 points
    • Big ol’ Texas star in circle: (of course) 1 point
    • Butterfly hanger (functional): 0 points
    • Banner all twirled up: 1 points
    • 3 Iridescent light bulbs (so that is what those are): 3 points
    • 2 sunflower wreaths (ugly) 2 points
    • White angel (hiding behind utility pole): 0 points
    • White flat iron lady bug (another flat one, really?): 1 points
    • Patriotic heart with stars and Texas hanger on porch: 1 point
    • Really cool white birdhouse on porch (maybe that is what the orange tabby is stalking): 1 point
    • More flowery bits on the porch (is it a wreath?)(and ugly): 1 point
    • Twirly hanger with a flower angel and sunflower bow thingy (hangers again): 1 point
    • One white gnome standing – one reclining?: (good eye) 8 points
    • Green birdbath base with purple orb (interesting color choices): 2 points
    • Tiny orb on a stick – (I know, night report needed) (yep): 1 point
    • Iron sundial next to tall finial trellis (hmm, sundial basically do work): 0 points
    • 2 orange orbs along sidewalk – one looks like it is melted (it has been hot here): 2 points
    • Some white twirly thingy behind tree next to drive: 1 points
    Subtotal: 58 points

    Creativity Bonus

    The yard presentation has a lot of random bits and pieces but I love the inexplicable lamp in the garden bed: 1 point

    Total: 59 points